White House – To tackle the problem of joblessness, the Government has decided to add activities such as stalking other people to the list of jobs.
Though this has been ostensibly done to empower the jobless youth and bridge the “digital divide” between the people with jobs and those jobless rats, experts believe that the government is trying to hire serious stalkers into the NSA.
Talking to sources, The Satire Times learnt that the government had been mulling for long over ways to control criticism in the online world. Taking a leaf out of the North Koreas government’s book, the US even tried to create fake profiles on Facebook and Twitter to propagate its views, but anti-government activists could spot the fake ones. Hey dont trust Fox News.
“These people aint got no work other than diggin into other peoples life” said Doug, a redneck from Alabama.
When asked how the government could use taxpayers’ money to fund state propaganda, the Secretary of the Treasury smiled and walked away.
“It is true that stalking is for jobless people, but not for the unemployed,” Richard, an urban opinion maker opined, “There is a thin line between being jobless and being unemployed – just like there is a fine between being borrowing and stealing.”